Christopher

I believe we can agree that Christopher is one of our stalwarts, with clear thinking and a helpful perspective. It is jarring and quite disturbing to hear his cry now. Fifty-four days out of work with serious relapses and now in a nursing facility. And that unanswerable plea to anyone who will listen, “Where does anyone turn to at times like this for answers?”

There are no answers.

What do we say to someone in such need?  I am sure many of us have felt the terror of a body seeming to spin out of control. Serious sickness is not for the fainthearted. Maybe junctions like these reveal to each of us who we really are. It is said there are no atheists in foxholes, a judgment I do not buy. The belief I fall back on in moments of crisis is in myself.

I know I have said this a thousand times. I believe we are stronger than we believe. We are survivors. And we have learned to be resourceful. Christopher, is your mind clear? I hate to see the wounded lying by the side of the road. Can you think your way out of this? I know. A silly thought. Can we help?

Think. We are with you. We are your friends.

 

 

21 Responses to Christopher

  1. Nan October 25, 2015 at 10:19 pm #

    Christoper, Please know that you are loved, cherished and held in the hearts of all of your friends. We want you to know that your intelligence, capacity for understanding and patience have been a blessing as we all navigate this condition. Your intellect has helped tremendously in understanding the whys and wherefores of this thing we call MS. You need to know there are others out there who care about you and truly give a Damn about you! I’ve been thinking about you ever since I read your initial post about what you’ve been through. I’m so glad that Richard responsded to you the way he did. I hope that seeing your name in the title of his message helped you to know how important you are and how we’re all pulling for you! We’re in this TOGETHER!!! Rest and gain strength in the knowledge that you have a team of us pulling for you!!!

    • Richard M. Cohen October 26, 2015 at 7:35 am #

      Amen.

      R.

  2. Yvonne October 25, 2015 at 11:04 pm #

    This is our refuge. Here we can vent our frustration and our fears without judgment. Thanks Christopher for sharing yours. It will let many know that it is OK if they too are feeling that way. Even if they only read here maybe your frank post will give them the courage to vent out loud what they are feeling. The experience of having an incurable progressive disease is not something everyone can understand.

  3. Ann October 26, 2015 at 9:04 am #

    Thank you Richard for hearing Christopher’s post. Thank you Christopher for your posts. Although I am not currently going through a major relapse at this time, I feel the fear and frustration that you voiced. I too spend way to much time on medical research as well as calculating how to fund my life and health care for many years. It is scary when you get to the point that your body is interfering with your focus. It is hard to just heal with your mind racing about your next step. There should be some counselors where you are who can help you explore available options. Speak up and ask. You do not have to take their recommendations but it could lead you to options that you may not have thought of. My best to you in your journey!

    • r. cohen October 28, 2015 at 1:54 pm #

      Thanks.

      R.

  4. Louisa October 26, 2015 at 11:53 am #

    Richard, I’m so glad that you wrote this post. I have been thinking of Chrisopher and I am glad he will be able to feel some emotional support.

  5. Jeff October 26, 2015 at 3:30 pm #

    Echoing others thoughts, we are with you Christopher. When things get rocky, this disease scares the crap out of us. Whatever comes next, however, we DO have the ability to deal with it. It may suck, it may be tough, but the human spirit is strong and if we focus on what is real, we can get through it. I have referenced it before, but this post from the Wheelchair Kamikaze continues to help me in tough times…

    http://www.wheelchairkamikaze.com/2009/10/footprints-and-shadows-tao-of-ms.html

    • Yvonne October 26, 2015 at 9:39 pm #

      Jeff- That piece is so good and puts MS and how we perceive ourselves into perspective. The Tao reference is perfect. Thanks for sharing. I bookmarked it to read on my “woe is me” days.

  6. Jan1 October 26, 2015 at 4:39 pm #

    Richard, that was so great of you to post to/about Christopher. Empathy, true empathy, and caring are huge — and you extended that to him. I think we all echo your concern.

    Christopher, I am so sorry for what you are enduring. So very difficult. You are cared about.

    Richard, I am strong, but not strong enough to ever only rely upon only myself.

  7. Vikki October 26, 2015 at 6:27 pm #

    Christopher,

    I will only say to you that you will get through this. There is no other choice. From reading your posts here, we know you have too much to say. So much to contribute. It’s hard, this disease is cruel, and unrelenting, and unbearable sometimes. But you will get through.

    • Richard M. Cohen October 26, 2015 at 8:09 pm #

      Thanks. I trust Chrisoppher hears our voices.

      R.

  8. Grandma October 26, 2015 at 8:59 pm #

    Christopher,
    Other than offering my good thoughts and prayers, I don’t know how to help. I live in Vancouver, WA and if I am close enough to be of any help please let me know. I have always enjoyed reading your posts and I feel as though you are a friend. Please keep us posted on every improvement you will be making.
    Jeanne

  9. Kat October 27, 2015 at 8:30 am #

    Woke up today feeling sad, mad and scared about this stupid MS, but after reading the genuinely caring responses to Christopher’s present condition, the dark cloud in my head has cleared. Thank you everyone for your truly human and real thoughts. I hope it helped Christopher to keep pushing forward. I know that it helped me. Thank you

  10. Jana October 27, 2015 at 8:36 am #

    Please add my voice to all the others. Be strong Christopher! We are here!

  11. Andrew October 27, 2015 at 9:07 am #

    Thank you Christopher for your honesty, and taking the risk to tell us the truth of your feelings as you experience the present days of your MS journey. Thank you Richard for your caring and integrity in how you approach this supportive forum of fellow MS sojourners with steadfast authenticity. While I only know Richard’s image from seeing him in the media, I imagine each of you who share comments here. I truly value the multiple ways you have found to express to Christopher your caring and encouragement. Christopher, I join the many here who know we do not have answers for you, but we share living into the “questions” in our own way. Sending you my sincere thoughts and imagery for improvement, strength, and some kind of inner peace for your current and coming days. Thank you for your past wisdom and sharing on this forum and for being so much more than this disease can ever diminish. (And thanks, Jeff, for the wheelchairkamikaze link, it really spoke to me.)

  12. JoanZ October 27, 2015 at 9:18 am #

    Christopher,

    The sun will rise again for you. Somehow it always does. When I reach my place of hopelessness, music always lifts my mood. Now if only I could remember that and go there first. Still learning…you are in my thoughts. Healing energy coming your way.

  13. Sue in TX October 27, 2015 at 8:37 pm #

    Christopher, I am so sorry about your poor health right now. I too have sought wisdom and guidance from Buddhism in my darker moments. Buddhist Tony Bernard says learning, “‘how to be sick’ is not about becoming passive or indifferent. It’s about accepting the current state of your health and, with that as your starting point, learning to take the best care you can of your body and your mind”. This is Because, We are not are bodies. Our bodies do not define our self worth. And the state of our bodies is separate from our emotional and spirtual states. I wish you well, Christopher. In all ways.

    • Yvonne October 28, 2015 at 12:02 am #

      Sue-A great reference. Thank you

  14. Dale October 28, 2015 at 12:39 am #

    Awww Christopher your words have always been insightful and inspiring. I really think when you’re better (and have every confidence you will be) you should start on a book at some point. Even if it’s made up from components of that new blog. We are all pulling for you.

  15. Betty October 28, 2015 at 7:19 pm #

    I want a “like” button for all of the recent posts. Our arms are around you Christopher, and with power, and love. Know it.

  16. Anne October 31, 2015 at 5:43 am #

    Christopher you are in my thoughts and prayers. I have always enjoyed reading your informative posts. I hope you can gain some strength from all of us because we do care and hope you feel better soon.

    Anne